Friday, April 25, 2008

It's like the whole world stops to listen @ 4/25/2008 04:11:00 PM

do you ever remember the feeling when you're in love, heart broken and then found a new "love of your life"? you know, that crazy little feeling that keeps you going. what you call the "reason for happiness" and all? mine's not exactly like that. it is my recent "reason for happiness" but not exactly the "love of your life" thing. i mean, it's not yet getting there and i'm not sure if it would go there. i just have my fingers crossed that it would. ever since "pween" suddenly disappeared, honestly, i became so numb about that matter once again. after the "blackman days", i wanted someone who wouldn't leave me hanging. he said he would never do that, but hey, how can i be so stupid? of course he can do that. that's why GoD gave us free will. i just believed that it would be different because i thought that through the times we've been together, we have already found some reason left for us to hold on to when this "summer disease" comes. but of course, it wasn't a walk in the park. it was just so disappointing that everything good and bad happened in one day. he was happy that morning, then suddenly, it all became so moody at night. that was the weirdest thing i ever encountered with him. then suddenly, he popped out again and started texting me with some cheesy stuff which was so weird because we were in a dark place that time. he knows how stupid he was that time and yet he wanted to skip that conversation. GoD, how jerky can that be? that's what i hate the most about jerks, they tell you they love you, then they leave you, then comes back as if nothing happened. but don't get me wrong, i still want us to be friends. ayokong masira yung samahan naming dalawa just because of some misunderstanding. hindi naman kami kaya okay lang na bumitaw. nauna nadin naman siya kaya why not? but(!) thank GoD i was saved. :) i never focused on my problem with "pween" because i was madly having summer fling with this guy. you probably know him as "stranger" because of my gm's. and if ever you have read my post which is entitled "falling stupid for you", yes, his name is Ivan Santos. it's still in some place where we just steal glances and look the other way so that we won't catch each other looking but i REALLY wish that it would go somewhere. hahahaha. after that tournament, i still go to LPTC gym because of my STOMP classes during tuesdays and thursdays wherein i have to commute after my make up classes. and every after classes, while lexii and i are in starbucks or jolibee or while we're already in the car lagi kong binubulong ke LoRd, "LoRd sana naman po makasalubong ko siya papuntang LPTC gym, kahit makasabay lang po sa pagbaba sa overpass o kaya sa may stairs sa gym", sadly, wala pang natutupad. it's either mas maaga ako or mas maaga sya. i guess GoD has His own timing for everything. right? but i'm glad to take the waiting game again if it's gonna be worth it. after all, summer pa lang naman eh. anything can happen, let's just wait and see. sayang nga lang kasi last session na namin yun sa STOMP kahapon. kaya, oh no, pano na. hehe. ilang araw na naman kitang mamimiss.

siguro naman naramdaman niyo na yung feeling na kinikilig pag tinitignan nung crush niyo. diba ang sarap ng feeling? hehehe. ganyan din ako pag andun ako sa gym na yun eh. nakakakilig kasi pasimple pa yung glances namin. yun yung thrill part dun eh. eh may mga ibang lalaki kasi na pakapalan na talaga. as in tititigan ka niya hanggang sa matunaw ka, trying to sweep you off your feet. sure, nakakakilig yun minsan, pero let's face it, kinikilig lang tayo kung gusto natin yung guy diba girls?! admit it, napipilitan lang naman talaga tayo kapag ayaw natin eh. and the guy's wrong move is when he assumes you like him back. yun na yon eh. sarap sampalin. bwahaha. alam niyo yun, yung tipong ang sarap sarap na niyang sigawan ng isang malaking "hindi kita gusto!" magaassume pa din. mga lalaking magfoforce talaga sayong isabit sarili ng patiwarik sa kisame eh. hayy, back to stranger.. ayun na lang naman yun, masaya lang talaga ako pag andyan siya. yungmag iimagine ka ng mga pwedeng manyari. mga what if's, mga "awww moments"... mga ganun. so that's it. i'm damnly falling, hope you guys are loving your summer too. :]